Don’t Fall Prey to Victim Mentality – HEALTH NEWS. Attitude is everything. Mental attitude, no matter what the end goal is, either helps you get there or impedes your progress, and one of the most damaging attitudes anyone can adopt is victim-mentality.
What is victim-mentality?
Victim mentality is a negative mindset. It places blame on other people, and circumstances for any unhappiness felt within.” It is the proverbial “point the finger out” scenario.
Those engaged in victim-mentality view life through a narrow lens of pessimistic perceptions, believing whatever occurs in life results from external causes. Inner reflection is never considered. Being a victim means absolving themselves of blame. Nothing is their fault – ever! Those engaged in victim mentality most often enjoy the attention, sympathy and validation they get from playing this “poor me” role.
When trapped in victimhood, the focus becomes on how vulnerable we are rather than on how powerful we are.
While no one is born with a victim mentality, no one is exempt from playing the victim role either. Instead, sweet elder grandparents, loving, well-intentioned mothers and fathers, teenagers and even those considered “spiritually awakened” can all be found to dwell in this defeatist realm.
In fact, every person alive has played the victim role more than once in their lives.
Victims want to be mentally prepared for the worst. Sadly, for those dwelling in victim-hood, this self-sabotaging behaviour becomes more powerful when things seem to go their way as they are sure “disaster is waiting around the next corner.”
So, how does one break free from this self-defeating, “poor me,” pessimistic type programming, most of which was developed and adopted as a child?
It all begins at home with your perceptions/how your view yourself. Do you perceive yourself as a survivor or a victim?
Survivors embrace life and flow with it. They live in the present and take control over their lives. They are fully aware that they alone are responsible for what occurs. They know that taking responsibility for their lives, they are empowered to change their lives.
Victims, on the other hand, wallow in self-pity and argue with and push back at life. They dwell in the past, believing they are helpless to change circumstances – their key to avoiding responsibility. They live defensively and stay frozen in time, without making progress because their perceptions tell them they are powerless.
The cost of victim mentality is high. It negatively affects every area of life – professional and personal. Those who see themselves as a failure dwell in victimhood because failure only comes to those who give up.
We must first own it to shift out of the victim mentality. We can’t change what we don’t own. Instead, we must shift our attitude and know that “change begins with me.” We must embrace survival and take action steps… no matter how small or insignificant they may seem, towards some goal we want to attain.
Most importantly, we must continually empower ourselves with “I can” and “I will” statements and put a stop to degrading “I can’t” or “I won’t” statements and beliefs.
And, we must embrace gratitude – the greatest of attitudes. Daily, we need to reflect on everything that makes us happy and everything that is going well in our lives. Keeping our mind/energy focused on positive situations helps to counteract the victim mentality.
Ultimately, we must honour ourselves with the same degree of respect and love that we try to give others. Only then will our minds and actions shift from victimhood to survival mode.
We can’t control others’ actions or every circumstance in our lives, but we can control how we react to them. We don’t have to be victims. It is a choice. Whatever happens or comes our way, we must view it as a challenge and not an excuse.
Looking for a powerful partner to help erase the negative victim tapes that play over and over in your head? Look no further than your local gym. Getting your blood flowing and your “happy, feel-good” hormones kicked in through challenging exercise is one of the best ways to overcome negativity, defeat victim mentality and put yourself on the fast track to feeling physically, mentally and emotionally healthy.
“You, as much as anybody in the universe, deserve your love and affection.”